it's 2am++ in the morning...almost 3 i guess?watching the repeat 'Life as we know it' while i'm typing...and it's been quiz after quiz...at least our dfund quiz was not this week...but had CKT,EPT and tml...or later willbe the maths quiz.the big bomb.agh.dfund was ok ok...didn't study...jus went in blind and guns blazing.CKT...i tried.but yea.mind was on something else.maths...today study for much longer than i expected...wanted to do he wrtoral presentation today,but ending up doings maths and more maths.didn't do wrtoral.still.she was there.ok.not really making sense.more 'bout that later.went to school,dfund lab...did the JK flip flop...and did it wrongly.jus one wire.aghhhh...made me re-do the freaking circuit 3 times! 3 fraking times!!! have a lab test next week.sadly...in the first shift,so i have to go at normal time...but ends an hour early.anyway lab ended eraly still,meet with S to get the MS office cd from her,no word or ppt or excel on the laptop when i bought it.haha.then the dfund lecture...pretty boring.number coversions were real easy! was not paying much attention...jus thinking.then lunch with mel,lionel and zhi xian.at design canteen....and my goodness.that zhi xian jus keep staring at the girls.plus the fact is it's sooo bloody obvious.for goodness if u wanna stare at hot girls.look without looking! use the 'side' look...pupils staring straight but your' looking sideways...haha.best with sunglasses.then u can look everywhere.well.almost.ate western again for lunch.hehe.only thing i like there.EPT after lunch.did the quiz.did the project 'test' and doen with it.fast and quick.went to meet mel with his gf at business there...waited for tien,branddon and brendon(their names sound so similar.gah)...slacked at business concourse lvl there....while we wait for dear old jen.but decided to go to the library first...got into a project room.yea.and i was at the other end of the table from her.but damn.they had to make me sit besdie her.not that idon't want it....but hell,it felt so werid can? agh.at leats it's better than having zhi xian sitting beside her.haha.after the libaray closed....me tien jan and bran went to eat dinner near 800+...beside the KFC there.went to mac after that.study summore.and bran made me sit on the same table as tien....but i jus sat opposite her.didn't dare to sit beside her.AGH! *smacks head* stupid stupid stupid.went home earlier than them...wanted to watch the OC and plus i've already finished with all the maths stuff.hell,it didn't stay in my head long anyway.walked home then.missed the first 10misn of the OC....but watched it.and revised my maths and now here.blogging.heh.and watching tv!ok.her.tien.on friday night.saw her nick....'whole mind is about him...every second was thinking about HIM.' and my heart jus sank like the titanic...cos i knew it was not me.my midn was jus dreaming about that one lil chance that it MIGHT be me.how naive.asked her about it.and yea...confirmed.was some other guy from her class.she asked me if i liked her...i at first didn;t say anything....but in the end...she knew.hell was trying to study CKT afterwards.nothing went in.she's jus been running round and round my head!!!AGHHHH.then next day saw her at business...when i went to buy the food...saw her walk in.avoided her eyes.she saw me...but didn't say anything...i didn't either.damn it.she had her arms around another guy!!! what was i supposed to say??? damn...i was really jealous...that image of her holding another guy's arm.it hurt.was heartreaking.but she did walk past my table few times...i knew she was there she looked my direction a few times.but i didn't look...she said it wont be any different,things will still be the same...how can that be? she knew i liked her.it's gotta be hella awkward.even today.it was so werid k....before she knew.we taked happily...was fun...now i hardly talked to her.not even eye contact.damn it.agh....hardly talked during the time in the library.even after that.i hate this!!!i shud never have told her....or say i didn't.now i feel like jus getting over her.but i wanna be with her.self conflict.gah.even asking her out was hard.always so busy and stuff.with other grils,was easy...pick a day time.and went out....had fun and sometimes ended up in a relationship.but with her it's not the same.i'm jus so into her.her eyes....her smile...and that ashamatic-like laugh that she has.how she is always so cheerful all the time.feel so...cofused...and tired.when? when can i meet a girl who is into me as much as i m into her? with S yea.but thats over now.been over a year.never been single for so long before.i jus want a relationship that can last...is that so hard to ask? jus one girl.ONE.jus let me find my soulmate...>.<ranted enough.3.35 now.took a while to type.well i was watching tv also.[rach...if u wanna know,ask , i'll say if you'll listen. =P ]i hate this.-jF